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November 1, 2000 Dearest Alex, Just received some very bad news. A flight leaving Taiwan on its way to Los Angeles crashed today. Our good friend Tina Yeh, her father, and her aunt were onboard. At this point, her name isn't on the list of survivors. Grant called a little while ago to break the news. It hit hard and I had a good cry. Still feel my stomach all tied up in a knot. She last visited in July and stayed overnight before heading up to Vancouver where her mother's family lives. I last spoke with Tina a few weeks ago before she left on her trip to Asia with her Dad. She was looking forward to the break as the work at IBM had been pretty intense; an audit or something. I first met Tina at an Asian American conference held at Yale University. She graduated from Yale a few years after I did so our classes didn't overlap. I think the conference must have been in the late 80s or early 90s. Since then, she has visited often and we have visited her when we traveled down to the Bay Area where she worked at IBM. When Tina first came to visit, you must have been about 2; it was before you had started at the Denise Louie Early Education Center and were just starting to use the toilet. I can see her by you coaxing you to do your business. |
Tina visited when you were in Denise Louie and at The Happy Medium School. She was very impressed with Happy Medium. When Tina visited, she would bring cool things for you to play with. Perhaps the biggest hit were painting books that used water. All you had to do was wet the pages and colors would appear. She loved my orange raisin scones so I'd always make a batch when she was here. She loved you very much and thoroughly enjoyed the time she spent with you.
I'm not sure how to break the news to you. I think I'll wait until the weekend so that I'll be able to tell you when you're not tired. When you are tired, bad news really makes you sad. The other night, we had to gather things for Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead). You're making your ofrenda (altar) for my Mom for your class. They are celebrating Dis de los Muertos rather than Halloween. It brought back lots of memories and you were crying when I put you to bed. I comforted you for a while and went to bed. But I heard you crying still so I climbed up onto the bunk bed with you (you moved onto the top bunk and Cassandra moved into the bottom bunk last weekend) and held you until you were ready to go to sleep.
Tina is the first friend I've lost suddenly. When my Mom died, I knew she was leaving us. On an intellectual level, I knew her time was short and I prepared myself for it. It was difficult and I cried a lot after you had gone to sleep. When her time came, it was something I expected and I was, in most respects, ready. Tina, whose voice and laughter I can hear as I write this, was not supposed to leave us so soon. She was bright, cute, cut no slack, and was teasing, in a fun way, in her remarks. It seems most of my women friends are this way. It's almost a requirement for Yale women. We had many good times talking about kids, romance and dating, life, and everything else. I will miss her dearly.